Hyderabadi Batein in Tapori Style.....Chottu from Hyderabad

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Hi All,

This is Prince, and i'm posting my first stuff..

In Hyderabad we have our own little Johnny. His name is Chotu. His father has ambitions to educate Chotu. Chotu goes to a school located in Tappachaputra. Its Teacher was educated in an Urdu medium high school and claims that he passed tenth class! There is a school
inspection the next day and the conversation is as follows :

Teacher:
Kal inispector ayinga. Sawalaan (questions) puchinga. Sab achchaa padkey aau re. Koi galath answer deengaa naa tho main uske TANGAAN thod ke haat mein rakhtoon.

Chotu:
Iski maakki ki chut. Kyun aara re bhadcow inispector?
Kaam nai hai ma ke laude ko? Kya kochchanaa puchta kathey ma ka lauda?

Teacher:
Abey tereku kaiku re, tu kal school NAKKO AA RE. Tu tera moo khola to
gaaliaan NIKALTAEN. Tereku main absent nai daalthaum. Ghar pe baithkey gotiyaan khel TERE AWARA DOSTAON KE SAATH. Tu school aayingaa to inispector ke saamney mere izzat PINDE ME MILJATI.



So our Chotu is excited, goes home and tells his
father that he is not
going to school the next day.

Father:
Yeah kyaa hai..ischool hai ya paan ka dabba hai? Gaand
pe maartoom sale, tu ischool nai gaya toh.

Chotu:
Arey Bava, mera teacher bola nakko aao, bolke.

Father:
Usku akhal hai ki nahi! Begum suno! Chotu ischool nai
jayinga kathey kal. Agar ino ischool nai gaya to kaise padhinga?



Chotu, agar tu kal ischool nahin gaya naa, tere haathan PAWAAN thod
daaltaum.

So Chotu cries and finally agrees to go to school.



Next day at



ischool, the Teacher is very upset to see Chotu back:

Teacher:
Arey teri maakki. Nakko aao bole to bhi kyun aaya re?

Chotu:
Mera bava gaand phodtum bola … ischool nai gaya toh.

Teacher:
offo?! Tera bava bola? Theek hai chal. Last bench pe
baith
aur inispector aya to chchup jaa. Dikhnaich nai. Kuch
bhi gadbad
karinga naa meri noukri bulle mein mil jayingi.

So Chotu goes to sit in the last bench hiding behind a
tall guy.
Inspector comes for the visit.

Inspector:
Adaab.

Teacher:
Adaab saab. Bachen acha padrain saab Kochchanaa puchey to answeraan yun bolte.

Inspector:
Abaa? AISA KIYA! Itte kilever (clever) hai aapke bachchey?
Achchaa, ek bahuth easy sawaal - Hamarey body mein sab se nazook cheez kaun si hai?

Teacher:
Arey Imtiyaz tu bata rey!

Imtiyaz:
Saab, Khaleja saab.

Inspector:
Aisa! ..... woh kyun?

Imtiyaz:
Saab, khaleja hai to sab kuch hota. Agar woh gaya naa, kuch bhi nahin hota saab.

Inspector:
Abaa, kya tez potta hai rey! Aur koi?

Teacher:
Arey Akram, tu bata re.

Akram:
Saab bheja saab. Bhejey ku khuch bhi hua to kuch yaad nahin rehta saab. Haathaan pairaan kaam nai karthey, iscooter ku kick bhi nai maar sakthey saab.

Inspector:
Abey Teacher, kya kya padaaraa re inku tu. Chutiye ke
jaisa answeraan
bolrai naa!!

In the meantime Chotu is trying very hard to hide but
Inspector sees
him. He thinks Chotu is hiding because he does not
know the answer.

Inspector:
Woh last bench pe yun jhuk ke baithaa naa woh pottey ka naam kya hai?

Teacher:
kaun saab? .......Woh!
(under his breath iski bhain ku, kaiku dikhaa re tu)
Woh Chotu hai saab.

Inspector:
Chotu? Ye kya naam hai? Kahan-kahan se lagaathey re
bhai
naamaan! Chotu, woh lambu ke peechchey kaiku chchup
raa tu?

Chotu:
Saab main moo khola to teacher maaringa saab.

Inspector:
Tereku yaa mereku??

Teacher:
Arey kya baath kar reh saab, main kaiku maarthaum. Ye potta ekdam badmaash hai saab, jhoot bolraa. Abey Chotu, answer maloom hain to bol nai tho khaamoosh baith jaa under hi breath mere baap tere pau padthaum.

Chotu:
Saab answer 'Gaand' hai saab.

Teacher:
Allah!! Ine moo khola meri naukri bulle lag gayi re!!!

Inspector:
Abey kyaa to bhi bolra re! Sharam kar badon ke saamney
aisaich baathaan karthey! Yeich sikhaaye tumhaarey
amma-bavaa? Gaand kahaan kaan ka answer hai re?

Chotu:
Hau saab, gaand ich sabse naazook cheez hai. Kaiku bole tho wahaan pe dilli mein baamb phata....Yahan Hydrabad mein apni gaand phat thi.. Yahaan old city mein gadbadaan shuru hothey....wahaan new city mein sabki gaand phat thi gadbadaan wahaan phailtey kyaaki
bolkey. Udhar kyoon saab, main yeh answer bolraun naa, mere teacher ki gaand phatrai



Dekho! Dekho !